Layoffs + High Expectations Can Equal Disappointing Bowl Games

You can't tell it from the quality of my blogging, but I write stories for a living.

No, I really do.

I'm not a great writer, but I do ok.

But I have to keep doing it, you know? I have to write and write and write to keep on my game, if you will.

I keep hearing – and you hear this every year – about college football bowl games and how some teams, like Florida against Louisville and LSU against Clemson – have come out flat.

Many reasons have been speculated by the sports TV and radio pundits. As a guy who lives in Virginia, I want to think those games in particular are a product of ACC football rising to dominance.

But we all know that's not the case.

You know what is the case? (I'm stating this as a fact, by the way, just like when all the college football experts give their opinions.)

Layoff!

Yep, just like me taking a month break from writing, how can we expect college football teams to end their regular season, take five or six weeks off from live competition, and then come back to the same proficiency they displayed during the season?

It's why some teams come out looking like it’s the first week of the season, and that's why many of the big schools schedule softies for opponents to open their new campaigns.

When a team takes off so much time, it's almost like beginning the season all over.

The layoff isn't the only reason these bowl games are so unpredictable – you know Louisville had a lot of motivation to knock off SEC power Florida – but it ranks the highest on my list.

When Notre Dame and Alabama take the field Monday night in the championship game, who knows how those teams will perform?

Notre Dame last played Nov. 24 against USC. Just think of all the things you've done since that date.

That was a long time ago. Forty-four days, to be exact. There was an entire month of no live football for the Irish and Crimson Tide, and we expect them to go out on the field and play the game of their lives.

Ludicrous.

I like college football, but there's a lot that needs to be fixed about the game. Implementing a four-team playoff is a good start, but even with the playoff, there will still be long layoffs.

One way to fix that problem, and a few others, is by extending the playoffs to more teams, forcing those teams involved to play games scheduled closer together.

Until that happens, we'll continue to see odd, unpredictable occurrences in bowl games… like total ACC domination!

Kobe Bryant and Avoiding the Physical Cliff

Two days ago I mixed some plyometrics into my workout routine.

Today, my legs are so flippin' sore it hurts to move. It almost hurts to think about moving.

Every day at work, I try to get up from my desk at least once an hour to walk around the building.

Today, I'd like to sit at my desk all eight hours and rest, just rest. Actually, I'd love to take a nap, Costanza style.

Hey, the boss isn’t here… Never mind. I'm sure someone would snitch when she returns.

If only I could go back to my warm, comfortable bed, sleep in between those 700-thread count sheets my mother-in-law got us for Christmas. That would be so nice.

Yesterday, I returned to work after being away from the office for 13 glorious days.

13 Days!

Do you know how great it is to sleep in for 13 straight days?

I really paid for that mini vacation of laziness yesterday when it was once again time to drag myself out of bed at 5 a.m.

Yuck a duck!

Oh, and the plyo did me no short-term favors.

I turn 42 in less than two weeks, but today I feel 62. Kobe Bryant would say I'm old as s**t.

I need to get my act together if I'm ever going to reach my goal of living to 104.

What do I need?

More sleep. A better diet – no more sugary drinks. More exercise. Yes, ever more plyometrics.

I know. I know. This sounds like a New Year's resolution, but it's not really. This is my everyday struggle. The day, the time of year doesn't matter. This is the crap I remind myself of everyday… usually after downing a Starbucks Frappuccino.  

It's time, I guess… no, I know, to get better. I'm not in horrible shape, but I'm not nearly where I'd like to be. And I'm quickly, at 41 years and 11 and a half months, getting worse.

So, yes, dammit, it is time to get better… before I fall over the physical cliff.

Or sign with the Lakers.

Semi-Automatic Weapons, Cars and Dumb Arguments

One of the most annoying and asinine arguments stupid people tend to make against gun control is: Well, cars kill people, so are we going to ban cars, too?

Isn't that the dumbest thing you've ever heard?

As we all know, or should know, automobiles are a mode of transportation and when they kill people, it's usually an accident. Usually.

Semi-automatic weapons, on the other hand, are designed for one purpose: to kill as many people as possible in a short amount of time.

One more time: Cars are for transportation and do kill people everyday through accidents. Semi-automatic weapons are handheld killing machines that no civilian has a legitimate reason to own.

Phillip Van Cleave, from the Virginia Citizens Defense League attempted to inject this weak-ass argument about banning cars on CNN Monday night as Piers Morgan was, basically, telling him how stupid he was for saying guns "are fun" and calling the AR-15, the killing machine used to slaughter 20 innocent children in Newtown last Friday, the "Ferrari" of weapons.

On a side note, Van Cleave also tried to blame the media for his comments, saying that a reporter asked him a question. I guess Van Cleave forgot he freely formulated and said those words and did not have the reporter's hand up his arse controlling him like a puppet.

Set Timmy Free

Hey, Tim. Are you still excited to be a Jet?

I'm guessing the answer to that question is a big, fat emphatic, "No!"

Manish Mehta, the Jets' beat writer for New York Daily News, tweeted last night: "Next domino in Jets QB situation: Tim Tebow will request to be traded/released after season assuming [Greg] McElroy starts last 2 games, per source."

First of all, with the Jets, nothing can be assumed. You know what they say what happens when you assume. Multiply that by 10 when trying to assume what the current Jets regime will do next.

As for Tebow, you can't blame the guy for wanting out. From all reports, it was his call to go to the Jets. I'm guessing his thinking was he could better expand brand Tebow and/or more broadly spread the gospel to more people from the platform of the world's largest media market.

I'm not sure what he was thinking, but whatever it was, it was wrong.

When Tebow was traded to the Jets, Rex Ryan told us we could see Tebow running some super secret form of the wildcat offense. Remember, they wouldn't even show it to reporters in practice. It was going to be earth-shattering when they eventually unveiled it in the regular season. It was going to blow the minds of defensive coordinators everywhere.

We're still waiting.

None of this is Tim Tebow's fault. He went to New York, fresh off turning Denver's season around and leading the Broncos to a playoff victory, thinking he was going to get playing time. And given his confidence and evidence from last season that Mark Sanchez was never going to be more than an average quarterback, I'm sure Tebow thought he could win the starting job.

He was never given a chance, most likely because he's not an NFL starting QB.

But the Jets specifically traded for Tebow. Brought him to New York and told us he would make a significant contribution to the team each. He may be in on 20 plays a game, Ryan said. We believed this, and I'm sure Tebow believed it, too.

We're 14 games through the season, and, except for that odd scripted insertion of Tebow into the game Monday night in Nashville, we've barely seen No. 15.

Whatever the circumstances, whether he could be a starting quarterback in the NFL or he just plain out sucks, the Jets need to grant him his wish – if that is really his wish – and trade or release him.

They haven't been fair to Tebow – perhaps they've even set his development back a year – and now they need to do the right thing and let him go.

Armed and Angry

I just happened to see this photo on Gawker.com accompanying a story about the NRA breaking its silence following the Newtown massacre.

As you can plainly see, the young shooter in the photograph is wearing a St. Louis Cardinals sweatshirt. I have to ask: Why so angry, young Cardinals fan?

Sure, your team didn't make it to the World Series this past season, but the Cardinals have won two of the past seven titles. Most fans would kill for that take that fortune any day.

So put down your semi-automatic child-killing machine, young man. Spring training is only 90 short days away.   

Sanchez Has (Butt) Fumbled Away His Starting Gig

Mark Sanchez: Sacked!

If you're like me, you're a bit sleep deprive today and totally ticked off that you stayed up kind of late last night watching a game that, if it were not so darn popular, could have set the sport of American football back 25 years.

Good golly, the Jets were horrible.

And it's not fair to pin this loss, and the horrible, horrible season, off on fourth-year quarterback Mark Sanchez, but dagnabbit he deserves much of the blame.

Four interceptions and a fumble lost, although the latter was not really his fault, is what Sanchez gave us on the Monday Night Football stage in a dreadful 14-10 loss to the Tennessee Titans in Nashville.

So now, Sanchez, the fella who earlier this season gave us the butt fumble – the play that will live in Jets infamy – will ride the bench this Sunday against the San Diego Chargers.

(Oh, wow. Someone just cracked a sinker in the office.)

Greg McElroy, not the glorified back up and personal punt protector Tim Tebow, will be the starter.

It was just a few weeks ago that McElroy replaced Sanchez in a game and led the Jets, if you can really say that, to a 7-6 win over the Arizona Cardinals.

McElroy was no Kurk Cousins that day and did nothing extraordinary, but he did lead the Jets to a game-winning scoring drive in which he found a wide open Jeff Cumberland in the end zone for Gang Green's only touchdown of the game.

It turned out it was the only score they needed to beat the Cardinals, the suckiest bunch of sucks who ever sucked.

So what does the benching mean for Sanchez in the long-term? That's yet to be determined, but it's almost certain, unless the Jets absolutely want him away from the team, that he'll be back with the team next year.

His contract leaves little wiggle room for the Jets to part ways with the QB, who, according to reports, is guaranteed $8.25 million next season. As ESPN New York's Rich Cimini writes: "Bottom line: He's uncuttable."

As for McElroy, we'll get a small sample size of what he can do this week and perhaps in Buffalo in the last game of the season. Those are two teams who basically have nothing to play for except for a strong desire to not lose to the hapless Jets.

If McElroy plays well, and perhaps even if he sucks, there's a good chance he's atop the leader board in competing with Sanchez for the top of the Jets' QB rotation in 2013.

Hamilton, Seattle and Caffeine

Can you see Josh Hamilton playing for the Seattle Mariners?

Better question: Can you imagine the Mariners paying Hamilton the money the slugger is said to be demanding?

Either way, there are reports out there stating the Mariners and Hamilton's reps are talking about a deal.

What interests me most is, if Hamilton does play in Seattle in 2013, gets on a hot streak and then cools off late season, what will be his excuse?

You can see where I'm going with this, right?

Yeah, I'm sure that in mid-August, when Hamilton's numbers dip a bit, a Seattle reporter will ask why and Hamilton will no doubt spout off some sorry excuse about he got hooked on Starbucks coffee and is now either drinking way too much or is trying to quit.

Either circumstance will yield reasoning to why the outfielder is suddenly not hitting home runs, striking out a bunch and missing routine fly balls.